The Question Is

What is one question your life centers around?

Mark Nepo asked this in a recent article in Spirituality and Health. What is one question your life has centered around? The minute I read this, I knew my answer.

Will I have enough time?

That’s my life-centering question.

By this, I don’t mean will I have enough time to finish this PowerPoint, or enough time to do yoga today, or enough time to take a lunch break from Zoom meetings. I actually mean, Will I have enough time on the planet?

I feel as if I came into the world with this question. I’ve always had a funny relationship with time. And even after five decades of wrestling with it, I am still on the mat.

When working with groups on strengthening their team culture, I often ask participants what inner role they each play on the team. Are they the cheerleader? The pragmatic one? The naysayer? The mom of the group?

Not surprisingly, I'm the timekeeper.

I'm the one in my house who says, “We need to leave at 11:45 if we want to be there on time.” Or “There’s no way we have time to go to the dump and plant the annuals and get to the grocery store before our friends come over!” Or in a meeting, I'm the one to notice, “We have about ten minutes left, so how might we best wrap up this discussion?”

I know time.

It’s kinda my best friend.

But other days we have a love/hate relationship.

I know time's intricate moves and its slippery energy. I see how it can stretch and stretch like Elastigirl, and other times, it can dissipate in the blink of an eye and be gone.

A coach friend said that in Mexico where she is from, time is a suggestion.

A suggestion!

If you say you are going to get together at 1:00, it could be 1:00, but it also could be 2:00 or 3:00 or even later.

If time is a suggestion, then what's another role I could play in life. The suggester?

Mark Nepo says regarding the one question your life centers around that it might be Who am I? or What is my purpose?

But that's a tough question for most. I’d pick an easier one. Perhaps "What would it look like to change my relationship to _______?"

How might I change my relationship to sarcasm? Or how might I change my relationship to food? Or how might I change my relationship to worry? Or how might I change my relationship to my father?

Don Quixote de la Mancha said, “Dress me slowly, for I am in a hurry.”

Ooh, that's a good one. Dress me slowly, for I am always in a hurry. Dress me slowly, because I have a life-centering question to ponder.